How I stopped caring about this team

This is from the SI thread. I didn't want it to get lost in there because this is probably it for me here for a while and even though I don't post very often, there is a reason and I wanted everyone to know why. And though I am not happy with it, I am content at this point to stop suffering at the poor results of a truly fallen program. I'll still be lurking around to check how the team is doing (and maybe throw in a post whining about Norm every once in a while) so continued thanks for the great site Dave. And may I be horribly wrong about all of this...

I first heard about the stipends in sports management class last year and that explained a lot imo. Guess we could have always been like this...

I should appreciate Norm's steadfast decision not to go "down and dirty." But, the truth is, I don't. It doesn't matter to me if the kids go to class as long as they win. I'm sure that isn't a popular opinion but imo it's the only one that will do us any good as a bball program. A successful major program doesn't have kids that are worried about their grades imo (and yes I realize I sound pretty uneducated myself saying this) it has kids that want to better themselves as basketball players and win games and make the NBA. I wonder how far off base I am here honestly because it does look a little weird written out but it's how I feel.

(This stems from having a class w/ Evans last year which he never came to and being a step away from all out rage when finding out Norm got a contract renewal because [among other reasons, none of which I've ever been able to figure out] the players were finally going to class. Maybe that's more on Evans than Norm but I do know I have classes now with Sky Lindsay from the girls' team and the team manager or whoever it is comes to make sure she is there everyday. No one ever came looking for Evans. {Sorry to keep rambling lol but I should say I see Burrell, Boothe, Coker and TJ in class pretty often so like I said maybe it was more Evans' fault than Norm's})

As rotten a sentiment as it may be, five years down the line I'm not really gonna be worrying or wondering about someone like Geno Lawrence. I rooted for him for four long long years and what did he get me, 50 wins? I won't exactly lose sleep wondering what he made of himself, whether or not he went to class. However, someone like Hatten who won games for me is a player I continued to follow (from Bucks rookie camp, to Clippers training camp [cut on the last day, I found out when I got back from Gm 6 of 03 WS and it killed me], to Poland, to Nuggets training camp, to Israel, etc, etc.) No homo or stalker lol but that was my boy and while I was younger and that might have been a littttttle overboard lol I wasn't nearly as worried about Omar Cook over the same time period because Hatten won and he didn't.

So all this (likely incoherent) rambling leads me back to why we need to fire Norm lol, at least from my POV. I, as it's pretty clear, could give a rat's ass if they go to class or if they have the highest team GPA ever (which though I may be an overachiever was a lot lower than mine and thus didn't impress me at all). The only thing I care about with regards to SJU basketball is "are they winning?" And ever since Norm got here, the answer has been no. To be fair, he got into a terrible situation and I am sure that's why he's still here. But no excuses anymore IMO these are his guys and he still isn't winning (yes I know we are 5-1 now but if anyone is holding out a lot of hope for the Big East schedule I think you're crazy).

(I got a little carried away here so you'll probably want to skip down to the next set of lines and then just read the one paragraph above that. I'm leaving it all here to make my point though.)
---

For the first time, I haven't been to a game yet this year and I haven't even felt bad about it. Maybe some of you remember a ridiculous post I made after the Rainbow classic last year detailing how I never missed a game. It was all true from when I was like 3 till last year. I remember being devastated at losing to UC Irvine in the last ever Lapchick Tournament. I remember waiting and waiting for Lopez and Hamilton to make it to the tournament and when they finally got there, being so disappointed that they lost the first game to Detroit Mercy. I remember staying up late to watch us beat Samford and demolish Indiana in 1999. I remember handling Maryland and pretty much shaking in excitement when Ohio State beat Auburn because I knew "hey, we got this." I remember Ken Johnson having the game of his life for OSU and Chudney Gray missing free throws and the last possession when I was convinced Scoonie Penn shoved Barkley out of bounds ending our season. I've still never been able to look at a replay but even though I finally believe Barkley dribbled it off his foot I still have an unbelievable hatred of Ohio State (and to be honest the rest of the state in general for other instances).

I remember playing OSU at the Garden the next year and blowing a 10 point lead in like the last 90 seconds and wishing horrible horrible things would happen to that f'ing school lol. I remember seeing our #2 seed come up on Selection Sunday in 2000 and looking the bracket over and really believing that we could make up for the year before. I remember ripping up pretty much everything in the house that said St. John's on it after we lost to Gonzaga in the second round. I want to forget the next season lol. I remember watching the first game in 2001-02 season on TV (imagine that!) against Stony Brook and being convinced Hatten sucked. I remember him taking over the world for the rest of the next two years and until somehow we win a championship he will remain my favorite player ever for it. I remember one of his few bad games coming in a loss to Manhattan in the Holiday Festival and losing it in anger denting a sign at the Garden. I remember being convinced our season was dead going into play Duke at 12-12 and then losing by double digits late in the second half. I remember going on a completely improbable run (Anthony Glover (!) hit a huge three to keep us in it) and tying the game. I remember Hatten stealing it from Daniel Ewing and for the only time I can ever remember (as a lifelong SJU and NYR fan) hearing the sold out (wow, imagine that again!) Garden absolutely silent as Hatten drained the free throw. I remember cheering my lungs out to the point where I couldn't talk the next day and the no joke crying Duke fans in front of me (not douchebag types either, but quiet seemingly nice people) were just asking me to shut up already as the Garden was slow and too excited to file out. I remember being in 8th grade in a class full of people who couldn't care less about college basketball and happily bragging and even being congratulated on our now meaningless NIT championship.

I remember it all falling down after that lol. I remember rapidly hating Jarvis (looking back on it, I'm not even sure how that happened so fast) and embarassing myself by screaming happily when I brought up espn.com on the last day before winter break for high school to see "Storm Clouds: St. John's fires Jarvis" as one of the headlines. I remember the worst season we could have ever gone through and the lowest of low points in Pittsburgh. Even as I have made clear how little I care about this team, I've never (and never will be again) been so disappointed in the team. But even then, I kept coming back and beating Georgetown with half a team to get that one Big East win was surprisingly gratifying. I remember talking myself into a coach who had a 21-82 record at D2 Queens College because, "hey, he can recruit NY." I remember coming back excitedly for a new era only to see Ced who couldn't shoot and Geno who couldn't lead. I remember having some measure of excitement about the team until I opened the newspaper to find out we kicked Epperson (one of our only decent players) off for a transcript problem before we played #19 NC State. I remember thinking the season was over until we held NC State to 10 points in the first half and won easily and I never stopped going. I remember a lot of times for Norm when things looked bleak and he pulled some upset out of his ass to keep me coming, like when we beat undefeated Pitt and then I think Louisville in the same week, or even ND last season. I remember the pain of losing to St. Francis as we rededicated the arena for Louie and the pain of watching Calhoun play a great game to fill in for an injured Hamilton against Providence and being excited at the prospect of watching him work with Burrell next season (which was last season obviously) only to have him be yet another transfer under Norm [I stopped counting somewhere down the line but I think he was up to 11 after Cav and Larry left]. I remember my friends from HS, who DID care about college basketball but rooted for other teams, making fun of my team for four years, but I never stopped defending them. I remember having Senior Basketball in Fitzgerald Gym at Queens College where Norm's number is retired and being full of anger about what happened to my basketball team every time I happened to look up there.

Finally (out of chronological order and only because this is getting WAY out of hand lol), I remember playing undefeated #9 BC in their last visit to CA in the Big East on a day that coincided with an epic snowstorm which rendered us unable to drive to the game. I remember putting like six layers on and walking two miles in a blizzard to see Norm not start Daryl Hill and, though we put up a good fight, eventually lose. I remember the Boston fans in my section (I hate Boston and may or may not have been talking shit when we were ahead early) following me out and throwing snowballs at me. I remember for once not being an idiot and walking away, happy that we at least put up a good fight.

-----------------------------------------

For anyone reading this who doesn't want to wade through all my bullshit, just go read the paragraph above this one and know that the rest of them are just like that. I once, very recently, cared THAT much about this team, a truly inordinate amount. When they announced Norm's extension last season, I finally made the decision to not get season tickets this season, and I can't say I miss them. Maybe I was a little out of control (okay, not maybe) and I still check up here to see how we're doing but it finally doesn't matter to me. Which, on one hand is a relief since obviously I cared a little too much, but on the other hand is sad since I wonder how come I was able to stop caring. I finally decided that if the administration is happy with a coach who shows absolutely no signs of not being a loser, then I shouldn't spend time and energy continuing to care about what happens.

This is with one obvious caveat: despite being pretty engrossed in the game, I'm no expert. Norm has ONE last chance to prove me wrong. If I'm coming to games next year, we either have Lance on the court or a new coach on the sideline (or, ideally, both). If Norm can get Lance to come here (even though I think that decision will come regardless of Norm or, if Lance goes elsewhere, because of Norm; that's right, I give no credit lol), I'll finally cut him some slack. But that is his last chance with me. If Lance is anywhere else in the world playing basketball next year, Norm absolutely positively HAS to go. Hopefully he will prove me wrong, but that's about all I have to hope for with this team now.

I'd rather the kids do well and win, but if given a choice I'd rather them win. 

Yeah I just realized it sounded like I wanted them to fail but practice 24/7 lol. Ideally it would be both (doing well in school and winning), but if it had to be one it would be winning...

Well that's three minutes of my life I'll never get back . . .

Well that's three minutes of my life I'll never get back . . .

your a fast reader.

i'm sure it's interesting reading...i'll hold off, however.

I didn't read this (yet maybe) but I got a great laugh out of the responses

Well that's three minutes of my life I'll never get back . . .

lucky you....I lost 5 minutes.

actually, it wasn't a bad read once i finally got to it.

actually, it wasn't a bad read once i finally got to it.

You're a better man than me.  I only got a few lines in and gave up.  At least throw some space in there NYReign!

Quote from: newsman13 on November 26, 2008, 02:05:18 AM

actually, it wasn't a bad read once i finally got to it.

You're a better man than me.  I only got a few lines in and gave up.  At least throw some space in there NYReign!

I skimmed it. NYReign really feels strongly about this as his facebook status is Fire Norm with a link to this article. Semester is almost over buddy, relax. Enjoy Thanksgiving break!

Also a few things I saw. You bust on Evans for not going to class doesn't mean he isn't doing well in the class. I don't know about you but I took my fair share of classes off. I was very diligent in either reading on my own, getting notes from others, or knowing the teacher didn't take attendance. I was a Dean's list student and I know with my major isn't anything to brag about but point is I was bright enough to not go to class and still get an A in the class. Some may have varying opinions on that.

I do remember reading your longwinded post after the rainbow classic last season. Walking to the BC game in the snow yadda yadda. If you haven't been to a game this season thats too bad. I hope you at least watched or listen to a few.

Glancing at the first line of this kid's suicide note of sorts I saw "sports management", and initially thought he was throwing in the towel because the school ripped him off by promoting the sports management program as worthwhile. The sports management program rivals the embarrasment of losing to St. Francis on Lou Carnesseca night aka the race to 50 pts. (Monty had a point blank lay up to win, and I love the irony that the place would have erupted due to a triumphant victory over...the terriers? I am a proud by default grad of the spm program and used a good gpa to get into law school, but I feel MOST enrolled in the spm program did not use their bachelors to convince their current boss to hire...nevermind their major. I had fun at sju which is most important, and for those of you that have taken those bs classes envision Fletch in her infamous white lace thong in the back seat and Captn. lazy Missere (Robert Barone) getting into his 1978 diesel benz (which he sleeps and shaves in) bellowing Hellooooooo Carol. gross.

hahahaha F'n Fletch. She was terrible. Dick Barnett is #3 on those power rankings.

To answer a couple questions lol

EddieMac: Yeah I was one and done for sports management. It was definitely fun but I realized that I was gonna have trouble finding a job or have to spend more time going to law school or something like that so I switched out of that pretty quickly.

Dave: I've skipped a few classes in my day too lol (I think I went to theology once a month last year) but the one Evans was in the guy took attendance every day and unless he took them elsewhere, Sean didn't take any of the tests so IDK how he would have passed. Going down the roll call one day in April, the prof. says "Sean?" expecting him to finally be there I guess, and then mumbles "oh why do I even bother anymore..."

Unfortunately the only game I've seen was the BC game (I was at the Knicks game while we were playing LIU) so I saw the one bad game but BC isn't all that good imo so it was pretty discouraging.

And no worries about enjoying Thanksgiving break. Despite how worked up I might have gotten in that post, it's actually a lot easier not worrying about whether a doomed team wins or not...I was even enjoying myself during school lol

This is from the SI thread. I didn't want it to get lost in there because this is probably it for me here for a while and even though I don't post very often, there is a reason and I wanted everyone to know why. And though I am not happy with it, I am content at this point to stop suffering at the poor results of a truly fallen program. I'll still be lurking around to check how the team is doing (and maybe throw in a post whining about Norm every once in a while) so continued thanks for the great site Dave. And may I be horribly wrong about all of this...

Quote from: NYReign on November 25, 2008, 10:29:59 PM

I first heard about the stipends in sports management class last year and that explained a lot imo. Guess we could have always been like this...

I should appreciate Norm's steadfast decision not to go "down and dirty." But, the truth is, I don't. It doesn't matter to me if the kids go to class as long as they win. I'm sure that isn't a popular opinion but imo it's the only one that will do us any good as a bball program. A successful major program doesn't have kids that are worried about their grades imo (and yes I realize I sound pretty uneducated myself saying this) it has kids that want to better themselves as basketball players and win games and make the NBA. I wonder how far off base I am here honestly because it does look a little weird written out but it's how I feel.

(This stems from having a class w/ Evans last year which he never came to and being a step away from all out rage when finding out Norm got a contract renewal because [among other reasons, none of which I've ever been able to figure out] the players were finally going to class. Maybe that's more on Evans than Norm but I do know I have classes now with Sky Lindsay from the girls' team and the team manager or whoever it is comes to make sure she is there everyday. No one ever came looking for Evans. {Sorry to keep rambling lol but I should say I see Burrell, Boothe, Coker and TJ in class pretty often so like I said maybe it was more Evans' fault than Norm's})

As rotten a sentiment as it may be, five years down the line I'm not really gonna be worrying or wondering about someone like Geno Lawrence. I rooted for him for four long long years and what did he get me, 50 wins? I won't exactly lose sleep wondering what he made of himself, whether or not he went to class. However, someone like Hatten who won games for me is a player I continued to follow (from Bucks rookie camp, to Clippers training camp [cut on the last day, I found out when I got back from Gm 6 of 03 WS and it killed me], to Poland, to Nuggets training camp, to Israel, etc, etc.) No homo or stalker lol but that was my boy and while I was younger and that might have been a littttttle overboard lol I wasn't nearly as worried about Omar Cook over the same time period because Hatten won and he didn't.

So all this (likely incoherent) rambling leads me back to why we need to fire Norm lol, at least from my POV. I, as it's pretty clear, could give a rat's ass if they go to class or if they have the highest team GPA ever (which though I may be an overachiever was a lot lower than mine and thus didn't impress me at all). The only thing I care about with regards to SJU basketball is "are they winning?" And ever since Norm got here, the answer has been no. To be fair, he got into a terrible situation and I am sure that's why he's still here. But no excuses anymore IMO these are his guys and he still isn't winning (yes I know we are 5-1 now but if anyone is holding out a lot of hope for the Big East schedule I think you're crazy).

(I got a little carried away here so you'll probably want to skip down to the next set of lines and then just read the one paragraph above that. I'm leaving it all here to make my point though.)
---

For the first time, I haven't been to a game yet this year and I haven't even felt bad about it. Maybe some of you remember a ridiculous post I made after the Rainbow classic last year detailing how I never missed a game. It was all true from when I was like 3 till last year. I remember being devastated at losing to UC Irvine in the last ever Lapchick Tournament. I remember waiting and waiting for Lopez and Hamilton to make it to the tournament and when they finally got there, being so disappointed that they lost the first game to Detroit Mercy. I remember staying up late to watch us beat Samford and demolish Indiana in 1999. I remember handling Maryland and pretty much shaking in excitement when Ohio State beat Auburn because I knew "hey, we got this." I remember Ken Johnson having the game of his life for OSU and Chudney Gray missing free throws and the last possession when I was convinced Scoonie Penn shoved Barkley out of bounds ending our season. I've still never been able to look at a replay but even though I finally believe Barkley dribbled it off his foot I still have an unbelievable hatred of Ohio State (and to be honest the rest of the state in general for other instances).

I remember playing OSU at the Garden the next year and blowing a 10 point lead in like the last 90 seconds and wishing horrible horrible things would happen to that f'ing school lol. I remember seeing our #2 seed come up on Selection Sunday in 2000 and looking the bracket over and really believing that we could make up for the year before. I remember ripping up pretty much everything in the house that said St. John's on it after we lost to Gonzaga in the second round. I want to forget the next season lol. I remember watching the first game in 2001-02 season on TV (imagine that!) against Stony Brook and being convinced Hatten sucked. I remember him taking over the world for the rest of the next two years and until somehow we win a championship he will remain my favorite player ever for it. I remember one of his few bad games coming in a loss to Manhattan in the Holiday Festival and losing it in anger denting a sign at the Garden. I remember being convinced our season was dead going into play Duke at 12-12 and then losing by double digits late in the second half. I remember going on a completely improbable run (Anthony Glover (!) hit a huge three to keep us in it) and tying the game. I remember Hatten stealing it from Daniel Ewing and for the only time I can ever remember (as a lifelong SJU and NYR fan) hearing the sold out (wow, imagine that again!) Garden absolutely silent as Hatten drained the free throw. I remember cheering my lungs out to the point where I couldn't talk the next day and the no joke crying Duke fans in front of me (not douchebag types either, but quiet seemingly nice people) were just asking me to shut up already as the Garden was slow and too excited to file out. I remember being in 8th grade in a class full of people who couldn't care less about college basketball and happily bragging and even being congratulated on our now meaningless NIT championship.

I remember it all falling down after that lol. I remember rapidly hating Jarvis (looking back on it, I'm not even sure how that happened so fast) and embarassing myself by screaming happily when I brought up espn.com on the last day before winter break for high school to see "Storm Clouds: St. John's fires Jarvis" as one of the headlines. I remember the worst season we could have ever gone through and the lowest of low points in Pittsburgh. Even as I have made clear how little I care about this team, I've never (and never will be again) been so disappointed in the team. But even then, I kept coming back and beating Georgetown with half a team to get that one Big East win was surprisingly gratifying. I remember talking myself into a coach who had a 21-82 record at D2 Queens College because, "hey, he can recruit NY." I remember coming back excitedly for a new era only to see Ced who couldn't shoot and Geno who couldn't lead. I remember having some measure of excitement about the team until I opened the newspaper to find out we kicked Epperson (one of our only decent players) off for a transcript problem before we played #19 NC State. I remember thinking the season was over until we held NC State to 10 points in the first half and won easily and I never stopped going. I remember a lot of times for Norm when things looked bleak and he pulled some upset out of his ass to keep me coming, like when we beat undefeated Pitt and then I think Louisville in the same week, or even ND last season. I remember the pain of losing to St. Francis as we rededicated the arena for Louie and the pain of watching Calhoun play a great game to fill in for an injured Hamilton against Providence and being excited at the prospect of watching him work with Burrell next season (which was last season obviously) only to have him be yet another transfer under Norm [I stopped counting somewhere down the line but I think he was up to 11 after Cav and Larry left]. I remember my friends from HS, who DID care about college basketball but rooted for other teams, making fun of my team for four years, but I never stopped defending them. I remember having Senior Basketball in Fitzgerald Gym at Queens College where Norm's number is retired and being full of anger about what happened to my basketball team every time I happened to look up there.

Finally (out of chronological order and only because this is getting WAY out of hand lol), I remember playing undefeated #9 BC in their last visit to CA in the Big East on a day that coincided with an epic snowstorm which rendered us unable to drive to the game. I remember putting like six layers on and walking two miles in a blizzard to see Norm not start Daryl Hill and, though we put up a good fight, eventually lose. I remember the Boston fans in my section (I hate Boston and may or may not have been talking shit when we were ahead early) following me out and throwing snowballs at me. I remember for once not being an idiot and walking away, happy that we at least put up a good fight.

-----------------------------------------

For anyone reading this who doesn't want to wade through all my bullshit, just go read the paragraph above this one and know that the rest of them are just like that. I once, very recently, cared THAT much about this team, a truly inordinate amount. When they announced Norm's extension last season, I finally made the decision to not get season tickets this season, and I can't say I miss them. Maybe I was a little out of control (okay, not maybe) and I still check up here to see how we're doing but it finally doesn't matter to me. Which, on one hand is a relief since obviously I cared a little too much, but on the other hand is sad since I wonder how come I was able to stop caring. I finally decided that if the administration is happy with a coach who shows absolutely no signs of not being a loser, then I shouldn't spend time and energy continuing to care about what happens.

This is with one obvious caveat: despite being pretty engrossed in the game, I'm no expert. Norm has ONE last chance to prove me wrong. If I'm coming to games next year, we either have Lance on the court or a new coach on the sideline (or, ideally, both). If Norm can get Lance to come here (even though I think that decision will come regardless of Norm or, if Lance goes elsewhere, because of Norm; that's right, I give no credit lol), I'll finally cut him some slack. But that is his last chance with me. If Lance is anywhere else in the world playing basketball next year, Norm absolutely positively HAS to go. Hopefully he will prove me wrong, but that's about all I have to hope for with this team now.

Is there a cliff notes version of your post that I can read ?

Glancing at the first line of this kid's suicide note

LOL that cracked me up!

This is from the SI thread. I didn't want it to get lost in there because this is probably it for me here for a while and even though I don't post very often, there is a reason and I wanted everyone to know why. And though I am not happy with it, I am content at this point to stop suffering at the poor results of a truly fallen program. I'll still be lurking around to check how the team is doing (and maybe throw in a post whining about Norm every once in a while) so continued thanks for the great site Dave. And may I be horribly wrong about all of this...

Quote from: NYReign on November 25, 2008, 10:29:59 PM

I first heard about the stipends in sports management class last year and that explained a lot imo. Guess we could have always been like this...

I should appreciate Norm's steadfast decision not to go "down and dirty." But, the truth is, I don't. It doesn't matter to me if the kids go to class as long as they win. I'm sure that isn't a popular opinion but imo it's the only one that will do us any good as a bball program. A successful major program doesn't have kids that are worried about their grades imo (and yes I realize I sound pretty uneducated myself saying this) it has kids that want to better themselves as basketball players and win games and make the NBA. I wonder how far off base I am here honestly because it does look a little weird written out but it's how I feel.

(This stems from having a class w/ Evans last year which he never came to and being a step away from all out rage when finding out Norm got a contract renewal because [among other reasons, none of which I've ever been able to figure out] the players were finally going to class. Maybe that's more on Evans than Norm but I do know I have classes now with Sky Lindsay from the girls' team and the team manager or whoever it is comes to make sure she is there everyday. No one ever came looking for Evans. {Sorry to keep rambling lol but I should say I see Burrell, Boothe, Coker and TJ in class pretty often so like I said maybe it was more Evans' fault than Norm's})

As rotten a sentiment as it may be, five years down the line I'm not really gonna be worrying or wondering about someone like Geno Lawrence. I rooted for him for four long long years and what did he get me, 50 wins? I won't exactly lose sleep wondering what he made of himself, whether or not he went to class. However, someone like Hatten who won games for me is a player I continued to follow (from Bucks rookie camp, to Clippers training camp [cut on the last day, I found out when I got back from Gm 6 of 03 WS and it killed me], to Poland, to Nuggets training camp, to Israel, etc, etc.) No homo or stalker lol but that was my boy and while I was younger and that might have been a littttttle overboard lol I wasn't nearly as worried about Omar Cook over the same time period because Hatten won and he didn't.

So all this (likely incoherent) rambling leads me back to why we need to fire Norm lol, at least from my POV. I, as it's pretty clear, could give a rat's ass if they go to class or if they have the highest team GPA ever (which though I may be an overachiever was a lot lower than mine and thus didn't impress me at all). The only thing I care about with regards to SJU basketball is "are they winning?" And ever since Norm got here, the answer has been no. To be fair, he got into a terrible situation and I am sure that's why he's still here. But no excuses anymore IMO these are his guys and he still isn't winning (yes I know we are 5-1 now but if anyone is holding out a lot of hope for the Big East schedule I think you're crazy).

(I got a little carried away here so you'll probably want to skip down to the next set of lines and then just read the one paragraph above that. I'm leaving it all here to make my point though.)
---

For the first time, I haven't been to a game yet this year and I haven't even felt bad about it. Maybe some of you remember a ridiculous post I made after the Rainbow classic last year detailing how I never missed a game. It was all true from when I was like 3 till last year. I remember being devastated at losing to UC Irvine in the last ever Lapchick Tournament. I remember waiting and waiting for Lopez and Hamilton to make it to the tournament and when they finally got there, being so disappointed that they lost the first game to Detroit Mercy. I remember staying up late to watch us beat Samford and demolish Indiana in 1999. I remember handling Maryland and pretty much shaking in excitement when Ohio State beat Auburn because I knew "hey, we got this." I remember Ken Johnson having the game of his life for OSU and Chudney Gray missing free throws and the last possession when I was convinced Scoonie Penn shoved Barkley out of bounds ending our season. I've still never been able to look at a replay but even though I finally believe Barkley dribbled it off his foot I still have an unbelievable hatred of Ohio State (and to be honest the rest of the state in general for other instances).

I remember playing OSU at the Garden the next year and blowing a 10 point lead in like the last 90 seconds and wishing horrible horrible things would happen to that f'ing school lol. I remember seeing our #2 seed come up on Selection Sunday in 2000 and looking the bracket over and really believing that we could make up for the year before. I remember ripping up pretty much everything in the house that said St. John's on it after we lost to Gonzaga in the second round. I want to forget the next season lol. I remember watching the first game in 2001-02 season on TV (imagine that!) against Stony Brook and being convinced Hatten sucked. I remember him taking over the world for the rest of the next two years and until somehow we win a championship he will remain my favorite player ever for it. I remember one of his few bad games coming in a loss to Manhattan in the Holiday Festival and losing it in anger denting a sign at the Garden. I remember being convinced our season was dead going into play Duke at 12-12 and then losing by double digits late in the second half. I remember going on a completely improbable run (Anthony Glover (!) hit a huge three to keep us in it) and tying the game. I remember Hatten stealing it from Daniel Ewing and for the only time I can ever remember (as a lifelong SJU and NYR fan) hearing the sold out (wow, imagine that again!) Garden absolutely silent as Hatten drained the free throw. I remember cheering my lungs out to the point where I couldn't talk the next day and the no joke crying Duke fans in front of me (not douchebag types either, but quiet seemingly nice people) were just asking me to shut up already as the Garden was slow and too excited to file out. I remember being in 8th grade in a class full of people who couldn't care less about college basketball and happily bragging and even being congratulated on our now meaningless NIT championship.

I remember it all falling down after that lol. I remember rapidly hating Jarvis (looking back on it, I'm not even sure how that happened so fast) and embarassing myself by screaming happily when I brought up espn.com on the last day before winter break for high school to see "Storm Clouds: St. John's fires Jarvis" as one of the headlines. I remember the worst season we could have ever gone through and the lowest of low points in Pittsburgh. Even as I have made clear how little I care about this team, I've never (and never will be again) been so disappointed in the team. But even then, I kept coming back and beating Georgetown with half a team to get that one Big East win was surprisingly gratifying. I remember talking myself into a coach who had a 21-82 record at D2 Queens College because, "hey, he can recruit NY." I remember coming back excitedly for a new era only to see Ced who couldn't shoot and Geno who couldn't lead. I remember having some measure of excitement about the team until I opened the newspaper to find out we kicked Epperson (one of our only decent players) off for a transcript problem before we played #19 NC State. I remember thinking the season was over until we held NC State to 10 points in the first half and won easily and I never stopped going. I remember a lot of times for Norm when things looked bleak and he pulled some upset out of his ass to keep me coming, like when we beat undefeated Pitt and then I think Louisville in the same week, or even ND last season. I remember the pain of losing to St. Francis as we rededicated the arena for Louie and the pain of watching Calhoun play a great game to fill in for an injured Hamilton against Providence and being excited at the prospect of watching him work with Burrell next season (which was last season obviously) only to have him be yet another transfer under Norm [I stopped counting somewhere down the line but I think he was up to 11 after Cav and Larry left]. I remember my friends from HS, who DID care about college basketball but rooted for other teams, making fun of my team for four years, but I never stopped defending them. I remember having Senior Basketball in Fitzgerald Gym at Queens College where Norm's number is retired and being full of anger about what happened to my basketball team every time I happened to look up there.

Finally (out of chronological order and only because this is getting WAY out of hand lol), I remember playing undefeated #9 BC in their last visit to CA in the Big East on a day that coincided with an epic snowstorm which rendered us unable to drive to the game. I remember putting like six layers on and walking two miles in a blizzard to see Norm not start Daryl Hill and, though we put up a good fight, eventually lose. I remember the Boston fans in my section (I hate Boston and may or may not have been talking shit when we were ahead early) following me out and throwing snowballs at me. I remember for once not being an idiot and walking away, happy that we at least put up a good fight.

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For anyone reading this who doesn't want to wade through all my bullshit, just go read the paragraph above this one and know that the rest of them are just like that. I once, very recently, cared THAT much about this team, a truly inordinate amount. When they announced Norm's extension last season, I finally made the decision to not get season tickets this season, and I can't say I miss them. Maybe I was a little out of control (okay, not maybe) and I still check up here to see how we're doing but it finally doesn't matter to me. Which, on one hand is a relief since obviously I cared a little too much, but on the other hand is sad since I wonder how come I was able to stop caring. I finally decided that if the administration is happy with a coach who shows absolutely no signs of not being a loser, then I shouldn't spend time and energy continuing to care about what happens.

This is with one obvious caveat: despite being pretty engrossed in the game, I'm no expert. Norm has ONE last chance to prove me wrong. If I'm coming to games next year, we either have Lance on the court or a new coach on the sideline (or, ideally, both). If Norm can get Lance to come here (even though I think that decision will come regardless of Norm or, if Lance goes elsewhere, because of Norm; that's right, I give no credit lol), I'll finally cut him some slack. But that is his last chance with me. If Lance is anywhere else in the world playing basketball next year, Norm absolutely positively HAS to go. Hopefully he will prove me wrong, but that's about all I have to hope for with this team now.

You may be disappointed and disgusted with the current situation,
but, since you took the time and energy necessary to write that missive out,
you haven’t stopped caring.